written by: Afnan A.

Dear “Ginger Ale,”

I loved you very much.
And for some reason despite how much you have hurt me, I still love you a lot. So much that I still think of you everyday. I keep playing our good memories over and over again in the back of my head. Whenever a love song comes on, all my mind thinks of is you; so much that my eyes water up often by your memories. You are the one my eyes shed tears for the most, so much that my heart is aching now as I am writing about you.
You have moved on the next day, the day after our breakup, your Tumblr had posts of having new crushes, you have disregarded me completely the day I saw you on Wednesday, I know that you saw me as well, you just pretended that you didn’t. I don’t even know who you are anymore. Still I hold onto your good sides and the good memories of us because, I do not want to believe that the ginger Ale I encountered during the break-up week was the real ginger Ale …It wasn’t my ginger Ale.

-on apologizes and letter to future son

written by: Sanzida Begum

Dear Sohaib, 

Hey baby boy, it’s momma here. If things go as planned and you’re reading this letter that must mean that you’ll be starting high school soon, this blog of your Aunty Atera’s and mine will be part of the past and you’re not too embarrassed to hug your mom in front of your friends. You’re thirteen/fourteen and I need to tell you some things. 

First thing first baby boy, I love you to the moon and back and never forget that. We will have many arguments and you will get mad at me a lot and I’m sorry about that. But you need to understand, we’re not like most families. When I was your age, I had already lost my innocent view on the world and I knew how corrupted everything truly was. I realized how much everyone around me was hurting and that in turn pushed me to an edge of breaking. I truly hope you haven’t reached this point yet because I want you to be happy at all times. I never want you to have to go through what I had to. So I’m sorry if you get mad at me because I won’t let you go somewhere. I’m sorry if I’m a bit wary of some of your friends. I’m sorry if I don’t let you go out on halloween night. I’m sorry if I don’t let you go to a party. Most of all, I’m sorry you were born into such a corrupted and evil world where people treasure materialistic things over what truly matters.


written by: Afnan A.

“I would hold her in my arms and never let her go” thought Achlys as tears streamed down her face. It had been four weeks since Ruth and Achlys broke up. Ever since then, she couldn’t spend a day without smoking sixty cigarettes and bawling her eyes out. Usually, she smoked about twenty a day. But sixty was an unusual number to smoke, even for Achlys. That day wasn’t the best day in weeks either. She found out about her stage 4-lung cancer from her doctor. “The fuck I care” she mumbled as she lit her 40th cigarette. She continued sobbing as she pursed the cigarette between her lips. At least it was the only source of light in her freezing, dark room. She had been getting series of bad news for awhile. Like a domino effect, her life kept falling apart. Her grades dropped down, she found out about the cancer and losing her job just made everything worse. “How the fuck am I supposed to buy smokes now?” cried Achlys out of frustration as a notification popped up in her phone about her low bank balance. As if her day couldn’t get any worse. She hated the notifications too. Every time the phone lighted up with a notification, her hopes touched the sky, hoping it will be a message from Ruth. But sadly, it was never her. It had been a long, tiring day for her. As she curled up in a ball to sleep, she started going through screenshots of the messages she got from Ruth. “What changed you?” she whispered the unanswerable question in the air as she released her last puff of smoke. She couldn’t help but stare at a particular screenshot for a while.  
“Achlys: Did you reach home yet?
Ruth: You are like home to me. So no I didn’t.”

-on the dangers of a secret

written by: Sanzida Begum

We all have secrets, some are small, some are big. Sometimes we’ll share some of these secrets. But there are other secrets we refuse to tell anyone. Secrets we’re ashamed of and secret’s we’re afraid of. Secrets we attempt to avoid till we absolutely cannot. And these secrets, the one’s that we hold in and no one knows about are the most dangerous of them all. 

Because here’s the thing about those secrets: they can and will tear you apart. They will pull you apart, piece by piec e till all there is left of you is a mess of broken pieces waiting to be fixed. They will tug and pull at your heart, till they break your heart into a million and one shards; shards so sharp, they can stab you to death. They will bring you down and cause you to sink to your lowest point because there are no such things as a harmless secret. They will be your worst enemy, so vicious and vile, that they will claw at you till, all there is left of you are scars and fears.


written by: Afnan A.

Let me restate an obvious sentence that you probably heard from teachers or read in textbooks for a million times already. Humans are social beings. We live in a society to have each other’s backs, to care of each other, offering love, care and affection, etc. But the truth is, society has made up some preposterous rules and regulations for people to follow and if someone is different, society turns it’s back to the people instead being there for them. In this society we have plenty of dysfunctions like that. One of those unfortunate dysfunctions is Homophobia. According to Oxford Dictionary, "homophobia is having or showing a strong dislike and fear of homosexual people" - which really doesn’t make sense to me. “I hate you because you like people of same gender.” So much for having each other’s backs, right?        

I grew up in a very strict family with strong traditions. I have lived in a house full of people that completely loathe the community that I am a part of. I went out to the streets everyday where the “normal” people could’ve bash me if they found out that I am gay. I couldn’t come out to my friends until couple of months ago because I was consumed with the horrible fear that they would hate me forever if they found out my sexuality. Although I came out to my friends, I know my family will never accept me for who I am. I have turned eighteen and as I am dropping little hints about myself, I have been receiving strong condemnation from my own family and it aches m y heart to be not accepted by the ones I want to be accepted so badly.      
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